Thoughts on Purpose

mother-and-child

My plan to become a nutritionist came about because I’m interested in nutrition and in helping others, and I thought I could learn about ways in which a person could improve their own life by taking an active role in their health and eating nutritious food that they enjoy.

The problem is my mom just died, suddenly and without warning, and I can’t think of anything else. Spending all my free time studying is not something I am willing to do right now. Borrowing tens of thousands of dollars for a career of which the outcome is unknown—that’s not something I’m eager to do either. I keep wondering if I’m doing the right thing, and if I should quit altogether. I want so badly to receive a sign, a confirmation of what to do. I want this path to be easy, for my intuition to make it feel right, not to be clouded by uncertainty and doubt. Is something wrong with me?

Maybe I should just do it, put one foot in front of the other, and keep on trucking, and if it doesn’t work out, I’ll deal with it later. It can’t possibly be as soul-sucking as being in the marketing industry.

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